Mormon 2

Mormon 2:14

And they did not come unto Jesus with broken hearts and contrite spirits, but they did curse God, and wish to die. Nevertheless they would struggle with the sword with their lives.

I have always found the irony in this scripture interesting. And I think that it would not be hard to find many people today that are in the same boat as this, who find no joy in their lives and wish to die, but who fear death and will kill to preserve their own lives. We can contrast this with the people of Ammon who when they were converted would willingly lay down their lives to avoid sinning.

Luke 9:24

For whosoever will save his life shall lose it: but whosoever will lose his life for my sake, the same shall save it.

The gospel is full of glorious paradoxes such as this one. When we focus on ourselves and make our own life all important, then we waste it, it is lost. Ironically we will also take less joy in it, or no joy at all and we shall actually end up in a position where we prize our own lives above all else and will struggle to the death for it and fear to lose it, although it brings us no value and we may even resent the fact that we are alive. We love our lives unto death.

The other end of this is when we lose our life for Christ's sake. We focus on him and his work, which is the eternal life of all our brother's and sisters. We give of our time, talents, and energy to others, maybe even finding none left for ourselves. But we do it willingly because we do not covet our own lives, we lose them in the service of God. We find infinitely more value in our lives when we live this way. Our existence is full of joy and peace, we find Life. Ironically the closer we are to God the easier it is for us to lay down our lives, as Christ did. We do not prize our physical life because we have found a Life that goes beyond this world.

Mormon 2 has examples of both of these. First are the people we have already discussed that curse God and wish to die, but struggle or their lives. Secondly we have Mormon, who lived a lonely life as one of the few righteous members of his society. It's important to remember that joy and sorrow are not opposites but are meant to be experienced simultaneously. Mormon was righteous, he had been ...visited of the Lord, and tasted and knew of the goodness of Jesus. (Mormon 1:15) I'm sure that his relationship with God brought him great joy. But at the same time he was also filled with sorrow.

Mormon 2:19

And wo is me because of their wickedness; for my heart has been filled with sorrow because of their wickedness, all my days; nevertheless I know that I shall be lifted up at the last day.

As I read this I realized that I also live in a wicked world and that I need to prepare myself for this type of isolation and sorrow. While I will hopefully have a righteous wife and children I am not likely to work with many people who keep the commandments, or even believe in God. As the world around us grows more and more wicked we need to be like Mormon, who stayed righteous and tried to lift the society around him. True discipleship of the Savior has always been difficult.

Luke 9:23

And he said to them all, If any man will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross daily and follow me.

I know that being a righteous follower of Christ will not make me popular with the world and it may at times get very lonely, but if I want to find my Life, to discover my true self, I need to let go of all the worldly things and of selfishness, and love not my own life unto death. It seems to me that for someone who has truly lost his life in the service of the Lord, things like isolation and unpopularity and death will be minor inconveniences. Truly why should we covet our own life if it has already been given away.